Really, who discovered the world anyway?

I read somewhere that a thing called ‘self-esteem’ drives some people to do the craziest of things, even to killing and hurting others either verbally or physically. No one like losing face and most react strongly against those who caused it.

Well I could be the only exception in the world to the rule now. The things that a few bright people have been doing to my prestige have been beyond parallel in the world. I was like a ship caught in a storm (Been never on such a ship in my life). All my sails were torn and my bow was under water and I seemed so far away form shore.

All the subtle elements of the internet seemed to be against me. Every nook and corner hid newer threats (Guy’s, don’t take it all seriously. I am trying to conjure up some words to fill up the blank spaces that I see in the post I am about to write)
The pain and torment I underwent then were unimaginable (Though I know that most of you can and are imagining it at this very moment. If you can’t, think of how Andy Garcia looked in “When a Man Loves a Woman”.

As an aside I never thought a Hollywood actor could do a Mamootty.

( Mamootty is actor nonpareil in our cinema and perhaps in the world. His face is so fluid that it would take you places without you being aware of it. I think only women can emote like him, that is, show fleeting and varied emotions within the space of seconds. And he looks the macho male otherwise!

You need to see movie’s like “Thaniyaavarthanam” and Valsalyam” to know what he is capable of. Even In a commercial melodrama like the “ Pappayute Swantham Apoos.”(Papa’s own Apoos”) with no story line at all he did something unbelievable when he was being told that his only son was fatally ill. He had taken his son to the hospital to check a nose bleed.

I still can’t think of the scene without being affected. From a happy confident father of a ten year old at the top of the world he becomes …….. Well you have to see it yourself and watch what happens to his face and his body to really understand what I am talking about. Writers talk about some one’s face becoming “black”, this guy could do it.

Even guy’s like Al Pacino and Robert De Nero would require digital manipulations to make such things come on their faces.)

Well coming back to my pitiable predicament, I used to toss and roll around in my bed trying to calm myself (I suspect I am over doing it now. Yet let us give in to the current mood. This can’t harm any one can it? It may even cheer up some Seaweed’s. I could picture them strutting about to morrow).

The way my heart beat on those occasions (I too have a heart, take heart my dears). The tears I shed (I have an eye condition; it waters every now and then.)
Huh?
Any how, being a very courageous person (*whimper) I battled it out with myself and survived. Some are still singing ballads of my great struggle with the unknown forces.
And I naturally mused, (This musing has nothing to do with the muse that I usually speak of, she seems to have completely deserted me of late)

- Well as I was saying I naturally mused that the world was a very cruel place where good people like me have to suffer always. What kind of a world is this, where sincerity and honesty has no place? Really who discovered the world anyway! Because of our very goodness we are being laughed at (You have to pretend that you believe all this, you know, it is an aesthetic responsibility on your part)

Anyway I need to heartily congratulate myself on my great self control. I held on to it even when I felt like it was trying to go on a tour some place. (That is, on every moment)

If you want to see the current disciple of the long dead Mahatma Gandhi, just come and see me. I am the only existing practitioner of non-violence now. Bring your pills though.

For you might have an apoplectic fit in the process, yet as you know nothing ventured nothing gained. You are seeing the only man in the universe who seriously thinks on non violence at present.

But don’t expect much by way of the “half naked fakir” dress code. Though I would have liked to go stark naked even, unfortunately none seems to have a high opinion of the said dress code in our land. It is only practiced in the Himalayas (Himavant as per T.S Eliot and his Waste Land) at present. Tough guys them, those Sanyasins. It is said that there is a totally sub zero ‘culture’ at those frightening mountains.
Anyway I have a different dress code.

You might even find this modern Gandhi wearing the dress of ‘sayipp’ (Sayipp = sahib, sab, sire, we the poor Indians once used to call our European masters thus.) on a very limited scale.

Our own Gandhi wore European cloths at one time I think. Later he wove his own dresses. We don’t need to do that any more. We have the Mumbai mills to weave our cloths now. If the world permits we would fill the world with cloth.

Well that is the tripe for today.