Sunday, March 20, 2011

The case of Aandi Pandaram

Something has triggered the memory of a story in my mind.

It’s the story of Andi Pandaram.

Aandi Pandaaram was what people call vileness personified, the like, (hopefully) you would never come across in your life. He had swindled, robbed, cheated, humiliated, maimed, and hurt everyone he had ever met. There were hardly any exceptions (He was such a democrat in that regard). People used to shrivel up at the bare mention of this unimaginably inhuman character. Like all such enviable men, it was his wont to inflict numberless physical and mental tortures on his children and grandchildren. He used to make sure that they never spent a day with a dry eye.

But even inestimable men like him have to die one day and at last his day had come. The sublimely wicked, as you can guess, are generally very intelligent (there could be exceptions like the ‘Assange’ if you like , but they don’t really count do they? The poor slobs, they don’t even know what they are doing!) and hence he could guess that his sojourn on the earth was about to be over.

So the irrepressible man called all his children and grand children to his bedside and spoke to them in great anguish.

‘Oh, my very own’ (the unfortunate guys quaked at the implication of these words) ‘oh my very own, I have sinned against God, People and of course against you guys. But all that is now sadly past (he could barely suppress a wistful sigh while saying so). And I am about to leave this earth. As you can see I am penitent; I grieve over what I have done.

He paused a moment for effect. His offspring stood there mute, barely believing what they were hearing. Even in that weak condition the man’s force of evil and command over them were such that none even dared to think of saying anything in reply.

The guy looked contritely and almost benignly on his poor subjects and went on.

I know that once I pass-away demons would take possession of my soul and burn me in hell.

He stopped again and searched their faces for some traces of emotion, however light it was. His subjects were not very intelligent, but from years of experience they had learned to keep everything like feelings from their faces if they could help it while around the old man.

He now went on:

But please remember that I fathered you all and it is your duty to save me from this fate. The only way you could do so is to make it appear that I have been punished enough in this life itself. Would you promise me that you would do as I say?’

The poor fellows (may be secretly glad that they are about to be finally rid of the veritable beast) promised this.

The old horror continued.

‘Then my children, soon after I die, you should strip me down to my bare essentials and should drive a large pike up my arse as a punishment for my worldly sins”

The listeners were stunned, but the Aandi Pandaaram made them promise.

He died peacefully (like all the heinous do) and the faithful children did as he had instructed. Poor morons, they must have relished the act, no doubt. But the repercussions were dreadful. The news of the act spread far and wide and all those who heard of it were horrified. To hate someone so and do such things to even to the corpse!

Some of the more conscientious immediately informed the Police and Aandi Pandaram’s offspring’s had to spend the rest of their lives inside a high security prison and had to do hard labor for life.

Some never let go even after they die!

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