Jelly bones

It was John Mc enroe who remarked at Wimbledon that the grass was for cows.

Well it seems that the Indian cows are not very fond of grass at all. Yesterday the head cow of the Indian cricket team was delighted when he saw a patch of grass on the ground and probably thinking his herd would like to graze on it sent his boys in to bat. Well the grass must have been heavily toxic, for they turned up their noses at it and promptly departed. They scored heavily with their opponents. One opponent in particular, Stanes was delighted with the top notch performance of Indians. He reaped a mere five wickets for a few runs and fewer deliveries!

He was kind to remark that the Indians took fright after a few wickets fell and buckled under the pressure exerted by his team. He was also felt delighted with the Indian under preparedness. His team of course was well prepared and had done their home work. How fate changes, for it was the other day that Mr. Kumble the Indian captain had demanded a sporting wicket to play on. He was sure that if such a wicket was provided his team would produce a win…..

- For the other team of course!

He was cautious not to let it out just like that. What he was after was a good wicket where a result could be had! The grounds men at the new ground took his cue and produced a green wicket as if by magic. It ended in a fiasco, as could be expected from this team of jelly hearted hero’s.

The Indian team management must have been hopping mad. They decided to hand over the ball to the opponents on a green top. With speedsters smarting under the useless Madras wicket like Stane and N Tini the South Africans tore the fragile Indian batting down. It was over before it began. The Indians played a sort of Twenty 20 match. Their whole innings was over in 20 overs. This had not happened ever since the Indians entered in the Test arena. Well there is a first time for everything is not there? They scored a mammoth 72. Man if you really knew how difficult it was to make runs on a green top! We had to sweat blood to make as many!

Well the South Africans had done their sweating back at home and in Bangladesh. They mauled the Indian attack without mercy. They have now amassed a lead of 412 run lead in the first innings, enough to ensure a win for their team unless the Indians pull up something out of the ordinary. That is in the realm of the dreams. Never in the history of an Indian team has such impossibilities happened.

I am not disappointed, no, none of us are, for we know this team, well fed, well looked after, pampered and idolized by the masses, earning billions in return for the shoddy performances they come up with every alternate game they find themselves in……. We still go gaga when these invertebrates put up some resistance to a tough team, for what else have we to eulogize than this cowardly bunch that represent our land! We have seen this happen hundreds of times, but being what we are, a nation infected by the epidemic of Cricket we soon forget all that and rave about the few hurrahs that we have had.

I feel sorry for all the cricket fanatics that we have at present and we have ever had. We have always been cheated by our national team. Expect the worst guys
(to the live ones of course)…and do not ever imagine that things would ever change, we are assured of many such heart breaks in future.